What's next???

Tomorrow is my last day at school. I ended up staying here till the end, in some part because I felt obligated, but most importantly because of my small kids. I realize I am not a very good teacher, I don't teach them a thing. I am there so they can sit on my laps, hugs, kisses, etc'. I am the only teacher who happily spends the time outside when the smaller kids play with water and sand. We make sand cookies and splash water on each other...
It will be hard to leave tomorrow, the kids probably won't even notice. They are used to people coming and going. Last Friday, most of the teachers left (except Becky) and during this week, none of the kids even reminded them. I will definitely remember them!

Now, What's next?

I am trying very hard to resolve this one with myself. I mean I will stay in Cambodia to do some travelling for the next couple of weeks, but what next?
I decided to skip Australia & New Zealand in this round. So the question is should I make the arrangement to go back home, OR should I STAY? I mean, stay somewhere in Asia, there are so many places I loved. Stay for as long as I can, maybe try to find a job or something... I love the Asian pace of life, although it is rapidly changing, and the big cities loosing their Asian charm. There are still places, like Pai, Ninh Binh, Sihanokville, or even Phnom Penh's lake side which make me want to stay.
Well, in the mean time, I have started to prepare my mother, just in case. Yesterday, when she asked me when I am coming back (she asks this question every time we talk), I said I do not know. I am still out, and maybe will stay for much longer. I defiantly will not be home for the New Year, I said. She said she misses me a lot, but I am not sure how I feel...

"Leaving will be like waking from a dream, I think, the most intense and wonderful dream, knowing you'll never be able to dream again.
The only way to avoid waking is to avoid leaving. I will not leave here until I have lived here thoroughly, until it seeps into me, into blood, bone, cell, until I am full of it and changed by it, and maybe not even then." - from a great book I have just finished "Beyond the sky and the earth" by Jamie Zeppa.

That's the biggest fear, once you are there, you are not here anymore...

Be well!

P.S as always you can check out for pictures here http://www.flickr.com/photos/oksana-s/. Some are really bad, they were taken by really stoned people :-).